Day 3: Revisiting “Too Nice”

I think the concept of “too nice” is really unfortunate. What is this “too much of a good thing is a bad thing”? Anyone who feels that they are too beautiful, too smart, too healthy, or too successful…. by all means send some of that good my way.  If you start wishing some good away, you might just be left with all bad.

I refuse to change myself, unless it’s for the better. I refuse to give up some of my kindness in place of bitterness, insensitivity, hatred, or a mean spirit.

I get what they’re trying to say. I’m not trying to be nitpicky. I’m just tired of people trying to turn my gift into a curse.

I have some room for growth when it comes to confrontation. I have to be more assertive. Work on standing up for myself. Work on putting on a strong poker face. I want to be able to better defend myself, but in a Godly respectful way.

I had a confrontation at work last night. It was very one-sided, as it always is. I was a victim of misdirected anger. I actually stood my ground. I asked that person if I had said something to offend them. That comment seemed to cause them to retreat.

Asking them that question was growth for me. I faced the confrontation and attempted to solve the problem in a respectful way. My normal reaction is to just apologize and stop talking.

It should of felt like a success, but it didn’t. I allowed tears to well up in my eyes and my mouth started to quiver. I tried so hard not to sniffle and draw attention to the fact that I was hurt. When I left the situation the tears started to fall, and I had to take a 15 minute break.

I hate that I couldn’t control my emotions. It was my third 12 hour shift, and the whole week has been rough. Still I don’t want to be seen as weak. I hate that my coworkers saw me cry. A few people came up to me later and said I was such a nice person, soon I will learn how to really stand up for myself.

I got the feeling that people thought I was being to sensitive in the situation. It caught me off guard and at a bad time. I don’t react well to people talking down to me or to aggressive men, and it’s something that I’m working on.

My family does a morning prayer group. It’s strictly for prayer, but today they listened to my story of what happened last night. They were proud of me and the way I handled the situation. It means a lot to me that the people whose opinions matter to me the most are proud of me. They encouraged me that I couldn’t of handled the interaction any better. I pointed out the tears that welled up in my eyes. They told me that maybe God was using me to show this person how his words affect people.

This whole concept of being “too nice” is something I’ve previously battled with and  written about in  Being Too Nice and Bullying . I wish I could tell you more details about the incident today, but I don’t want to ever say too much and have it effect my job.

Thank you for reading and I’d love to hear your thoughts!


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